# I am the Watcher. I am your guide through this vast new twtiverse.
#
# Usage:
# https://watcher.sour.is/api/plain/users View list of users and latest twt date.
# https://watcher.sour.is/api/plain/twt View all twts.
# https://watcher.sour.is/api/plain/mentions?uri=:uri View all mentions for uri.
# https://watcher.sour.is/api/plain/conv/:hash View all twts for a conversation subject.
#
# Options:
# uri Filter to show a specific users twts.
# offset Start index for quey.
# limit Count of items to return (going back in time).
#
# twt range = 1 3418
# self = https://watcher.sour.is?uri=https://www.synkretie.net/twtxt&offset=2518
# next = https://watcher.sour.is?uri=https://www.synkretie.net/twtxt&offset=2618
# prev = https://watcher.sour.is?uri=https://www.synkretie.net/twtxt&offset=2418
In the night, it comes closer, settles in the comfortable darkness of your eyelids. Thinking you asleep, it oscillates, flows, murmurates
During the day, it's shy, seems to play hide and seek: A flash of neon in the shadow that seeps away into the cracks when you turn around
It is morning, you step outside to commute to work. Two feral catboys scamper off, watch from a safe distance if you brought any food
Metropolis is torn in dispute: Grant them human rights and citizenship, classify them as pets and legalize ownership, or eliminate the pest?
Since a bunch of catgirls escaped in a lab accident 15 years ago, catpeople have bred like crazy, helped along by many a lonely citizen
Outside, the sound of the crickets changes, becomes a binary modem screech. Something materializes in the shadows
The storm approaches and Artemis readies a lightning bolt on her rainbow. With Zeus asleep, she's free to hunt as many clouds as she wishes.
Much rarer than insomnia, immortia disrupts the other sleep: Those affected are denied disincarnation, survive in the unlikeliest ways
Day 8: Infection hasn't subsided. Spots on my skin have begun to glow at night. Roads appearing, a dust mote just landed on my nose, v heavy
Piloting an exosuit, looking down at your own body, wondering which of these heads is itching
Unable to survive outside the matrix, we send machines operated via VR telepresence. Making sense of reality levels becomes somewhat harder
(š) Wait isn't that what culture is?āµ(ā°) .oO(it's worse than we thought) That's exactly the wrong answer. Get out
(ā°) We ran a virus scan on your culture and I'm afraid that you'll have to get rid of all those memes before we let you into the council
As the world ends, the last instant is replayed over and over before god finally takes the needle off the record
These are demon protection glasses. Notice the silver grid inlay? That's a cage. They can't hurt you through the bars, just never ever peek.
autonomic nervous system: the involuntary partsāµautognomic nervous system: the voluntary, conscious parts
Biospheres only work when they're absurdly large, to get a stable biological system down to spaceship size you need at least a biotorus
The ancient practiced sky burials, left their dead in cymylbachs: Cloud graves. When a tree catches one, we dare each other to climb into it
HTTP/1.1 410.5 Not Yet AvailableāµLast-Modified: Fri, 14 May 2021 20:02:47 GMT
wikipedia: list of things millennials are killing
The other inflation hypothesis: Reverse engineering the universe's compression algorithm from skybox glitches [pdf, ps, other]
Unexplained artifacts in observation data from the Even Larger Telescope: The "compressed skybox" hypothesis [pdf]
World's gone crazy? News don't make sense? Looks like the dream's lost its lucidity again. Hey! Solipsist! Hey, you, fix this shit, ļ½ļ½ļ½ļ½
Sure, the universe is full of consciousnesses, but most of them lack a will to change the world in any way. ("stay epi", they call it)
There should be a school subject that is simply about tasting+smelling things properly, plus decent vocabulary for describing those smells
In the night, you watch the ground from a branch. The stars still shine, the night sky is below you, interrupted by roots and night animals
The leaves do not turn brown this time. Instead, the holes in the canopy turn a pale violet and float down, leaving an unbroken green
p-zombie (short for "politics zombie"),
The wizard catches a different kind of fire, crystal needles erupt from his skin to break off later, collect around his disintegrating body
"Please, you haven't been on the net for a year, if you dive in now it'll be a week until you recover from all the new meme strains
More practical than the Book of Sand, the Book of Glass consists only of two mirrors, yet contains infinite pages - when closed.
taking the rain to work, sitting in a nutshell drifting down first small streams, then the storm sewers, to be fished out at the destination
Magic was given only to players, but nobody's logged in in a few hundred years of game time. We run on hardware the admins have forgotten
Djinni can be found in any dormant light source. Tiny ones in luciferin molecules up to the most powerful, imprisoned in neutron stars
"is this your only reason for proposing this"āµpssh humbug [mutters under breath]
Why not model your AI boxes after skulls: Put a physical unclonable function into a tamperproof container & let it provide the core identity
In a pinch, when out of blood or moon ink, you can also fold a summoning pattern into the paper and get a haunted paper crane
You will choose not only the color of your self-driving car, but also its moral framework: Kantian, Alignedā¢, but also Nihilist (if you pay\n2017-08-29T02:21:07+02:00\tCompanies rent trawlers in search for the actual deep web: The knowledge of the Deep Ones, hidden in ocean basins, protected by black ice\n2017-08-29T02:20:06+02:00\tWe begin to get used to flood-caused Internet outages, but those bits of merfolknet that end up in search engine caches each time puzzle us\n2017-08-28T01:32:24+02:00\tYou've long been lost in these woods. You feel no hunger. The trees remind you of animals. Every morning, it is harder to unroot yourself\n2017-08-28T00:59:10+02:00\tConversely, ghosts of castles are often found within the minds of architects. Long destroyed but not forgotten, incorporated into dreams\n2017-08-28T00:21:51+02:00\tGhosts are attracted to castles, so if you make a few miniatures and just put them outside over night, you're bound to catch some\n2017-08-27T23:44:20+02:00\tmolting tip: don't leave your past self lie around just like that, its reproachful stare is bad vibes\n2017-08-25T12:45:43+02:00\tOur immortal descendants give themselves cancer to truly understand suffering, really connect with our art, at least for a day or two\n2017-08-25T12:34:56+02:00\ta truly eye-opening experience, yes, but we can open even more body parts if you like, belly-opening experiences are all the rage right now\n2017-08-25T12:31:53+02:00\tmobile: moving thingāµautomobile: self-moving thingāµautoautomobile: self-directed self-moving thingāµautoautoautomobile: self-making self-dire\n2017-08-24T01:09:43+02:00\t1. build self-driving cars that use humans for fuelāµ2. make them mimic uber/lyft/etc carsāµ3. releaseāµ4. sit back, enjoy the media panic\n2017-08-23T14:56:11+02:00\tbe this person to the other and transcend the universe together, live in mutually assured simulation\n2017-08-23T14:52:10+02:00\tget you somebody who understands you so well that you can't tell whether you're real or their simulation of you\n2017-08-23T14:43:15+02:00\tFlustered, his avatar begins to lag, then freezes out completely\n2017-08-23T14:36:49+02:00\tAn arm forms out of the smoke, steals your cigarette. Somethings pulls on it and the fumes slowly fill the grey outline of a face and body\n2017-08-16T15:47:36+02:00\televator pitch: it's like the internet, but not a warzone\n2017-08-10T18:50:12+02:00\ttablature but for holding talks, with eye movement and gesture instructions\n2017-08-10T18:49:02+02:00\tan AR overlay that indicates where it's socially acceptable for your eyes to be\n2017-08-10T18:45:24+02:00\tmagnetic shelves where you can put things on both on top and the underside\n2017-08-07T15:43:20+02:00\tso basically, software forks are like blockchain forks but you get to doublespend 0days instead\n2017-08-05T01:37:42+02:00\tthey had to fetch one reveler by boat, he'd wandered onto the lake while tripping and they were fearing he'd realize where he was and sink\n2017-08-02T02:23:48+02:00\tAmong these columns of fog, the wind is curiously muffled, storms no larger than buses weave through the air and grumble at each other\n2017-08-02T02:15:36+02:00\tIn the now exposed rock, clouds take root and form a forest supported by huge lazy gyres, while smaller whirls wander around drawing water\n2017-08-02T01:54:25+02:00\tThe mountains in the distance detach from the ground and tumble slowly through the sky, float among the clouds, thundering when they collide\n2017-08-01T01:37:48+02:00\tA popular AI countermeasure is basilisks that humans are too dumb to comprehend, but make any advanced thinker turn itself off in horror\n2017-07-31T02:27:01+02:00\tIllegal archives are gateways to lower levels, full of treasures but also pod trolls: ex-spelunkers now ridden by mindvirii, out to preach\n2017-07-31T02:24:13+02:00\tEvery time they drown the net in weaponized memes, it's quarantined and rebuilt, over time creating something akin to layered catacombs\n2017-07-30T02:15:37+02:00\tradio graffiti, wherein you paint letters into the spectrogram near the frequencies of popular numbers stations\n2017-07-29T11:52:33+02:00\tYou could anchor here, but usually whatever touches the spacetime floor will eventually crumble to dust, riddled by atom-sized bitemarks\n2017-07-29T11:51:57+02:00\tHow to detect when you're in a vacuum shoal: Light is slower, the stars brighter than usual and in weird locations, the autopilot crashes\n2017-07-29T02:13:36+02:00\tThat one memory you haven't thought of in months - they're huddled around it, taking in its warmth\n2017-07-29T02:00:42+02:00\tNeglected tulpas squat disused parts of your memory palace, wrap themselves in memories of near-forgotten friends to keep oblivion at bay\n2017-07-29T00:54:58+02:00\tbut the same drug, taken in a dream, induces total clarity instead of hallucinations, shows the universe naked (luckily, forgotten quickly)
You will choose not only the color of your self-driving car, but also its moral framework: Kantian, Alignedā¢, but also Nihilist (if you pay
Companies rent trawlers in search for the actual deep web: The knowledge of the Deep Ones, hidden in ocean basins, protected by black ice
We begin to get used to flood-caused Internet outages, but those bits of merfolknet that end up in search engine caches each time puzzle us
You've long been lost in these woods. You feel no hunger. The trees remind you of animals. Every morning, it is harder to unroot yourself
Conversely, ghosts of castles are often found within the minds of architects. Long destroyed but not forgotten, incorporated into dreams
Ghosts are attracted to castles, so if you make a few miniatures and just put them outside over night, you're bound to catch some
molting tip: don't leave your past self lie around just like that, its reproachful stare is bad vibes
Our immortal descendants give themselves cancer to truly understand suffering, really connect with our art, at least for a day or two
a truly eye-opening experience, yes, but we can open even more body parts if you like, belly-opening experiences are all the rage right now
mobile: moving thingāµautomobile: self-moving thingāµautoautomobile: self-directed self-moving thingāµautoautoautomobile: self-making self-dire
1. build self-driving cars that use humans for fuelāµ2. make them mimic uber/lyft/etc carsāµ3. releaseāµ4. sit back, enjoy the media panic
be this person to the other and transcend the universe together, live in mutually assured simulation
get you somebody who understands you so well that you can't tell whether you're real or their simulation of you
Flustered, his avatar begins to lag, then freezes out completely
An arm forms out of the smoke, steals your cigarette. Somethings pulls on it and the fumes slowly fill the grey outline of a face and body
elevator pitch: it's like the internet, but not a warzone
tablature but for holding talks, with eye movement and gesture instructions
an AR overlay that indicates where it's socially acceptable for your eyes to be
magnetic shelves where you can put things on both on top and the underside
so basically, software forks are like blockchain forks but you get to doublespend 0days instead
they had to fetch one reveler by boat, he'd wandered onto the lake while tripping and they were fearing he'd realize where he was and sink
Among these columns of fog, the wind is curiously muffled, storms no larger than buses weave through the air and grumble at each other
In the now exposed rock, clouds take root and form a forest supported by huge lazy gyres, while smaller whirls wander around drawing water
The mountains in the distance detach from the ground and tumble slowly through the sky, float among the clouds, thundering when they collide
A popular AI countermeasure is basilisks that humans are too dumb to comprehend, but make any advanced thinker turn itself off in horror
Illegal archives are gateways to lower levels, full of treasures but also pod trolls: ex-spelunkers now ridden by mindvirii, out to preach
Every time they drown the net in weaponized memes, it's quarantined and rebuilt, over time creating something akin to layered catacombs
radio graffiti, wherein you paint letters into the spectrogram near the frequencies of popular numbers stations
You could anchor here, but usually whatever touches the spacetime floor will eventually crumble to dust, riddled by atom-sized bitemarks
How to detect when you're in a vacuum shoal: Light is slower, the stars brighter than usual and in weird locations, the autopilot crashes
That one memory you haven't thought of in months - they're huddled around it, taking in its warmth
Neglected tulpas squat disused parts of your memory palace, wrap themselves in memories of near-forgotten friends to keep oblivion at bay
but the same drug, taken in a dream, induces total clarity instead of hallucinations, shows the universe naked (luckily, forgotten quickly)
She hides it well: It's only her third eye that's crying, trailing soap polyhedra and klein drops visible only to initiates
toddlers: "so what are you in for?" "ā¢šš, ššŗ" "shit man" "mmh" "the universe here makes you human, it's pernicious" [they share a rattle]
when you run a spam campaign with zip bomb attachments, is that dynamite phishing?
not tentacles, just arms with lots of joints - sometimes they break and heal crookedly but there's enough freedom that it doesn't matter
The correct mass noun for a swarm of pixies is 'jpeg', often occurring near windows since they're naturally drawn to them
Supercooled snowflakes fall, the ripples they cause in the pond instantly frozen, then floating away as small ice ships with crystal masts
Every morning on the commute, you spend five minutes looking at (fake, harmless) ads to inoculate yourself against today's strains
Your brain implant projects carefully timed fake smiles onto your face, to throw off the targeting and poison their training sets
Ad targeting so effective, anybody unprotected is rendered a consumer zombie within days, their every microexpression fed to the algorithms
It's easy to talk to other timelines: Write a letter, then read in it everything you didn't write
A beacon anchored in spacetime floats here, rocking back and forth in the gravity surf, the system it's marking long gone
frankly I can't hear you over the sound of memes copulating in my head
Wizards are often extremely jacked in order to have more blood and thereby mana; Vampires cheat but can hit 20 liters after a good meal
Blood has the highest magic capacity of all materials, making it one of the best choices for magic batteries as well as a great coolant
Wishing wells are an old metaphor for black holes: The wish is a program, the coins are input bits, only the response has to wait a while
Immobile, transfixed, impaled on a neuron spike
She hesitates - the telltale stutter of downloading a personality addon to deal with an unexpected situation
In the long run, each of your actions either results in nothing, or contributes to human extinction or a stable intergalactic civilization.
noise cancelling headphones that monitor the auditory nerve to squeeze out a few extra dB
when creating a pocket universe, make sure to leave open a portal at least a few atoms wide, or the reference loop detection will eat you
Their other bombs leave tree clouds (studded with brilliant blossoms), kelp clouds (endless ribbons), anemone clouds (betentacled, swaying),
A stone on his wrist tells the time - every time it has worn away, one of his days has passed
A Turing test in which the bot turns the tables and just rudely interrupts your every attempt at talking with "stop pretending sentience
Hell is famously litigative about pictures of their premises, they had to rebuild half of it after Bosch leaked internal concept art
if you're working on a text processor feature that predicts sentences as they're written, it'd be really neat if you called it precursorāµthx
Dividing atom diameter by Planck length, we can estimate that there's probably been two or more paperclip events depending on paperclip size