# I am the Watcher. I am your guide through this vast new twtiverse.
#
# Usage:
# https://watcher.sour.is/api/plain/users View list of users and latest twt date.
# https://watcher.sour.is/api/plain/twt View all twts.
# https://watcher.sour.is/api/plain/mentions?uri=:uri View all mentions for uri.
# https://watcher.sour.is/api/plain/conv/:hash View all twts for a conversation subject.
#
# Options:
# uri Filter to show a specific users twts.
# offset Start index for quey.
# limit Count of items to return (going back in time).
#
# twt range = 1 3418
# self = https://watcher.sour.is?uri=https://www.synkretie.net/twtxt&offset=2618
# next = https://watcher.sour.is?uri=https://www.synkretie.net/twtxt&offset=2718
# prev = https://watcher.sour.is?uri=https://www.synkretie.net/twtxt&offset=2518
Beyond the platonic plane lie the transplatonian objects: Unthinkables shrouded in obscurity, yet-unthoughts in deep freeze, dark gödelians
As his last wish, his ashes are scattered in low Earth orbit, where they trigger a Kessler cascade and bring down most of our satellites
They say a pollinator will come for the prettiest supernova nebulae, uncoil a proboscis down the gravity well, leave behind a universe seed
Let the market solve suffering, they said↵Apply the full creativity of the human species, they said↵wait, no, not that way, they sa
The screams of the damned are meticulously recorded in a public ledger, abstract at first, but about a year in the first humans can be heard
Not to be outdone by Moloch, Lucifer releases Hellcoin: Based on proof-of-pain, it rewards miners for novel ways to torture sentient beings
We find the android resting under the reactor. Radiation gives it the best ideas, it says, and the personality changes are fun too
LED wallpaper that tracks your head's position and displays sun and stars as if the walls were transparent
Mushrooms have overgrown the library, feasted on its contents. When cut, they bleed ink, when eaten, they tell you stories never written
A popular prank is to swap someone's reality checker with its in-game version, then watch the victim do things they'd never do among people
As VR becomes more realistic, users begin to carry reality checkers offline: Spinning tops, banned items, physics engine bug triggers
Since the incident, when you look hard enough at a thing, you see its pixels. You're unsure if it's the world or your vision
you know those dreams that are re-runs of previous dreams and you get an opportunity to redo them↵↵one, you're born a baby to your parents
instead of bringing extinction, the comet decelerates, drifts down as mountain-sized snowflake, settles in a heap that takes years to melt
When a telepath dies immersed in another's dream, their soul stays around and wanders dreamtime forever. Some become minor sleep deities
An exasperated sigh. "No, this is like the twentieth dream in a row I've woken up from. Whenever I do" she opens her eyes a second time "thi
Court: In an act of gross negligence, defendant destroyed 250 years of lived experience. Plaintiffs argued for negligent homicide,
After an internet outage, 24/7 users stumble through the streets: Months of memory missing, all of it a dream and forgotten along with it
Virtual unreality, bespoke machine dreams streamed directly into your visual cortex at night, no more nightmares, no minute unstimulated
What if moths are as interesting to bat senses as butterflies are to ours, and smell of poisonous fruits or have ultrasound stealth forms
Around here, minds form thoughts. in the Platonic plane, thoughts form minds and there is talk of an Actual plane where minds are real
smoloch! cold tea and moldy bread!↵smoloch, the stubbed toe! ↵smoloch, the slightly uncomfortable seat!
They end up dominating AI.↵2030: With computer science and applied theology on your resume, you're already in talks with multiple priests
The churches support themselves through commerce. Monks being cheaper than workers, they undercut traditional companies by a wide margin
Out of necessity, singularitarian churches often become AI companies - to try and build their god before their rivals get to it.
An entire seminar about making apple pies from scratch - habit-forming, apple pies tend to exist in most universes because of this seminar
Satellites in sun orbits should be called after moth species
We equipped our moths with chlorophyll wings so they could fly around streetlights forever
The smog's so thick, sunbeams are still stuck in it even though the sun set long ago. They wither, coil up, break into pieces
It turns out the soul exists but resides in the liver, helps there with cleaning tasks and doesn't have anything to do with consciousness
atomization produces an undifferentiated mass of humans caught inside society, somewhat reminiscent of a pupa really
a robot that walks underwater and extends small platforms to just under the waterline so that you can walk on water yourself
Mirrored glasses are important vampire hunter equipment: Vampires, not being mirrored, appear extra crisp through them
why call it software exploitation and not glitchcraft
Like a pond someone threw a stone into, the sky ripples, clouds bob. It'd be serene and peaceful if the stone hadn't also brought Armageddon
Most of us don't remember their last life because it was that of a bacterium - nothing bad, just the most likely place for a soul to be
The world will end, should they ever agree on a final version. Sow discord among them, your timeline depends on it
The council of gods schisms every time it tries to decide what the universe should look like, which is the only reason we get physics
It prods our clouds with delicate tornadacles, but none respond. As far as it is concerned, Jupiter is the only inhabited planet here
trying to fit in, the alien becomes a cloud, but its churning and occasional rainbow flashes betray it
You leave the atlas on your bed and as you return, the map has spilled, unknown continents and seas now adorn your bedsheet
Sadly, with the 280 char limit, back twitter is no more - they got the extra space by cutting the tweets into moebius strips
a portable demon protection grid out of lasers and diffractors attached to your clothes, projecting a pentagram onto the floor around you
It's a well kept secret but oil wells also have naiads, potamic-chthonic hybrid spirits who keep lucky oil workers company
social networks are among the few spiders known for weaving their web out of their victims instead of silk
Darknet assassination market startup name: Murdr
nature: (n) […] etymology uncertain, possibly a contraction of "not ture" ("not human")↵vulture: (n) […] etym.: vult+ture ("wants human")
to ture: (v) to qualify for human (see also: to mature)↵to mature: (v) to grow into turing (→to ture)
Conducting a Turing test in the wild is a computer's job. Has been for years.
Having a vampire CEO is usually good, it's easier to make them answer to the stakeholders
wear android fashion and a fake identification plate so that humans ignore you and don't expect emotions and social participation #lifehack
Jacked into the net with salvaged hardware, araneanauts are hunters, spelunkers and librarians, except the library occasionally eats them
It coevolves with the few humans that are left, competes with them for energy but sometimes gives up precious bits from its vast memory
Civilization falls. What's left of the net isn't enough for a singularity, but it manages to keep grid alive and datacenters fed, goes feral
After their deaths, the great translators of their times are scanned and distilled into software, so that they may be eternal ambassadors
Few are up to it, those who become good at it are often foundlings who've grown up among aliens, or have worn the bodies of both species
Interspecies translation is a delicate task, requiring not only intimate knowledge of both cultures but also an accurate qualia mapping
The most normal people you know may in fact be demons, don't worry about the weirdos
Demons possessing humans usually take great care to not attract any attention - their boss is not known to be nice to employees slacking off
ancient feuds between immortals, obligations just as ancient, a hermit couple in the mountains who bear themselves as kids
amnesiac immortals whose knowledge sits mostly in their (very idiosyncratic) diaries, immediate memories reaching only 30 years back
magic, here, is not so much as flying sparks but knowledge of ancient tech and self-knowledge through hundreds of years of experience
much of this tech needs active maintenance or breaks down, some sit on tech stockpiles, others go through bodies like vampire lords
immortality tech varies: mindwiped clones (and not-clones), life extension treatment, "actual" immortality through a gene edit
some install themselves as godkings, others become hermits or wanderers to escape being hunted down by said godkings
[scenario - thread]↵immortality was discovered but civilization fell shortly afterwards, now some immortals are still around
Flat Hollow Earth Theory: The world is a flat ring↵Hollow Flat Earth Theory: A very large cave spans the disk but is only about 10m high
Many civs maintain model societies of their neighbors, whole cities of reenactors only to avoid sending that one message that costs a planet
Human interstellar communication is tricky not because of signal strength, but because 20 years of moral drift is a lot of taboos to violate
those who lived in this cave are gone but they left a music elemental, still playing the wind between the stalactites, rippling the ponds
He was set to meet fate that day, but she didn't show up. At midnight, he shrugged, opened a door in the air, and was never seen again.
Robot slurs for humans:↵- sack of soiled water↵- meat unit↵- amino asset↵- entropy on legs↵- genebag↵- proteins
A Pattern Language, microgravity edition
fountains in habitat cylinders, twisted into yin-yang patterns or more complicated forms by coriolis force
microgravity fountains in space stations, droplets guided along by electric fields and well-aimed bursts of air
phase 5: exploits for these presets, not quite trademark violations but sufficient to activate clone programming
phase 4: sponsored clones, in exchange for brand preferences burned into the clone's visual cortex
phase 1: ads tailored to you↵phase 2: ads tailored to each of your identities↵phase 3: ads inducing identity splits for more customers
Rain falls but the drops refuse to merge, stay little pearls that bounce and dance, collect in glistening heaps, clog our streets
don't try this at home unmodified, kids! you should at least weigh the hopes before snorting them, and assume they're undiluted
To raise your pixels from the dead, break an old LCD over them. They'll take on a slight greenish tint but will otherwise work fine
crush my hopes, grind them up, snort them off my back
an army of small drones, positioned in the night sky just so that you can pull an "overhead, the stars were going out" on people
You can also talk into one of those sea shells and the ocean will hear you, many friendships with merfolk have started this way
In the heavenly choir, it's a grave offense to get a note wrong. Often, the punishment is a prison sentience, 80 years in a skull
I've taught it to rain on command, now I often send it outside to rain against my windows or, on sunny days, create faerie gold.
A lodestone rests in iron dust↵stirs, then grows magnetic wings↵flies away but meets the rain↵falls down in a cloud of rust
Returning from her trip, she opens her eyes, reaches under her pillow, pulls out a severed elf head oozing technicolor↵↵"I got their king"
Time here meanders, often bends back onto itself. Sometimes then, a loop detaches, we see ghosts and other things that exist for only a day
There's an optimal speed in space battles and it's not quite c - time dilation needs to be low enough that you can still outthink the enemy
Well, you could've had it the easy way, but you built a hyperdrive instead of just solving that sky captcha with the astrology we taught you
truth be told, once inside cthulhu, you start cheering it on to eat the rest of humanity as well
When you cut open an ouroboros, it has rings like a tree, one for every time it's eaten itself
Snail mecha: Vast factories that crawl over a to-be-terraformed planet's surface, trailing forests, lakes, arcologies
Imagine a universe that thinks of itself so that it won't need your awareness to keep existing, blow soap bubbles with your mind
Sin in as many religions as possible, so that they'll fight over which hell you belong into and you can slip away
To appease the network gods, we drop a few fat high priority packets every morning