# I am the Watcher. I am your guide through this vast new twtiverse.
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# https://watcher.sour.is/api/plain/twt View all twts.
# https://watcher.sour.is/api/plain/mentions?uri=:uri View all mentions for uri.
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# twt range = 1 2389
# self = https://watcher.sour.is?uri=https://feeds.twtxt.net/the-coding-love-programmer-humor-gifs-memes-jokes/twtxt.txt&offset=289
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When I have to execute an update on millions of records ⌘ Read more
When I receive mockups made with PowerPoint ⌘ Read more
When I start the build and will do absolutely nothing for the upcoming 5 minutes ⌘ Read more
When I am embarked on a new project in a hurry ⌘ Read more
When there is an heatwave and there is no air conditioning in the office ⌘ Read more
When the sales rep tells me JavaScript is like Java but for the web ⌘ Read more
When I ask the client to send me an email with his new feature ideas ⌘ Read more
When I fix a bug in production before people notice ⌘ Read more
When I realize I forgot to code an entire feature after I shipped to production ⌘ Read more
When I go see my manager after a production incident ⌘ Read more
When the lead developer fixes the bug I’ve been stuck on for the last hour ⌘ Read more
When I try to fix a bug in production ⌘ Read more
When I can’t fix a minor bug on Monday morning ⌘ Read more
When I leave the office to go on vacation ⌘ Read more
When I receive tickets on Friday afternoon ⌘ Read more
When I get 50 error messages for 10 lines of code only ⌘ Read more
When the sales guy is about to join a meeting with a complicated client ⌘ Read more
When I finally fix the bug I’ve been stuck on since yesterday ⌘ Read more
When I start working on a new technology without reading the documentation ⌘ Read more
When I watch the user work with the app ⌘ Read more
When I see my coworker running a git blame ⌘ Read more
When I succeed in shipping before the deadline ⌘ Read more
When the boss comes in the open space after our messed up production delivery ⌘ Read more
When I just lost thousands of records because of a bad backup ⌘ Read more
When they ask me to start coding while the project isn’t defined yet ⌘ Read more
When the console finally returns another error message ⌘ Read more
When I add a line of code I found online to my project ⌘ Read more
The sales team when we tell them we cannot ship the project in the upcoming month ⌘ Read more
When I take a look at the logs of a server we didn’t touch in 2 years ⌘ Read more
When my Google search only returns one result and it links to an Indian forum ⌘ Read more
When I receive several urgent emails on Friday evening ⌘ Read more
When I fix a bug without going on Stack Overflow ⌘ Read more
When our manager tells us there is a new reorganization and I don’t care at all ⌘ Read more
When my broken code from yesterday works fine today and I didn’t touch anything ⌘ Read more
When I’ve been in a boring meeting for 2 hours and I suddenly hear my name ⌘ Read more
When the project manager comes back from a successful client demo ⌘ Read more
When I try to run a project without configuring anything ⌘ Read more
When my feature passes the tests on first try ⌘ Read more
When I see an email telling us the project’s deadline is postponed by one month ⌘ Read more
When the new client tells me his database is an Excel file ⌘ Read more
When I run a piece of code I found online without trying to understand what it does ⌘ Read more
When they tell me the feature I’ve been working on for the last 2 weeks is no longer required ⌘ Read more
When I have to change something in a legacy project ⌘ Read more
When I do an unfinished feature demo ⌘ Read more
When I open our helpdesk system for the first time of the day ⌘ Read more
When we have to work on a legacy project ⌘ Read more
When I tell my boss I found a blocking bug and I cannot fix it ⌘ Read more
When a coworker asks for my help and it’s the end of the day on Friday ⌘ Read more
When they ask me to start coding without specifications ⌘ Read more
When I walk through the open space for a coffee and I get assaulted with bugs ⌘ Read more
When the sales guy is about to click on the button of an unimplemented feature during our demo ⌘ Read more
When the project manager makes a joke during our demo ⌘ Read more
When I hear the sales team promise unplanned features to the client ⌘ Read more
When I spent an hour following a tutorial to fix my project and nothing works anymore ⌘ Read more
My IDE when I declare a variable and don’t use it in the upcoming 5 seconds ⌘ Read more
When I take a coffee before shipping to production ⌘ Read more
When they ask me how I managed to fix a legacy bug ⌘ Read more
When the intern doesn’t understand what I’m doing ⌘ Read more
When the sales guy tells me more about my new project ⌘ Read more
When the lead developer goes into a meeting to defend our technical solution ⌘ Read more
When the week just began and I already have 20 bugs to fix ⌘ Read more
When my boss comes to see me for a “really urgent matter” on Friday morning ⌘ Read more
When I tell a user that I’ll take a look at his problem ⌘ Read more
When I try to fix a bug in production ⌘ Read more
When I’ve been working on the same project for the last two years ⌘ Read more
When I suggest some technical improvements to my manager ⌘ Read more
When I forward a complex ticket to the senior developer ⌘ Read more
When I cannot procrastinate anymore for that one task I need to complete today ⌘ Read more
When I try to follow what the sales team is saying in a client meeting ⌘ Read more
When my coworker asks me to check his regex ⌘ Read more
When the manager wants to know who’s responsible for the production outage ⌘ Read more
When I realize I spent the last hours debugging because of a missing parenthesis ⌘ Read more
When I sucessfully fix a coworker’s bug ⌘ Read more
When the app crashes during my demo ⌘ Read more
“The new project’s deadline is tomorrow”** ⌘ Read more
When the sales guy starts talking about his new features ideas ⌘ Read more
When I try to follow a tutorial and it’s getting more complex suddenly ⌘ Read more
When I spent the whole day debugging and my code still doesn’t work on Friday evening ⌘ Read more
When I finally get a complicated technical certification ⌘ Read more
When my code goes into the testing phase ⌘ Read more
When my meeting ran over for more than 30 minutes ⌘ Read more
When our delivery went perfectly smoothly ⌘ Read more
When I’m free to choose the project’s frameworks ⌘ Read more
When I take a look at the project I just retrieved ⌘ Read more
When the lead developer comes to my desk to help me fix a bug ⌘ Read more
When my big SQL query works on first try ⌘ Read more
When the client tries to click on our mockups ⌘ Read more
When I remove a useless line of code ⌘ Read more
When the sales team asks me to smile during the client meeting ⌘ Read more
When I’m looking for a command I already ran in my history ⌘ Read more